I'm really really upset right now... I want to play badminton. There's a tourney this Sunday and I need practice. But my immature father decides to have a little fun and lectures me on crap before I can take the car to go. Crap like you already played yesterday, do you know your own family's schedule today? I didn't even know why I even ask... >_> Should have just took the car and they call me. They don't need the other car, he was just trying to make it hard for me and I won't go. Congratz~ You got what you wanted, I'm not going. The reason is this:

1) I have to pay to play, so every minute we spend on this meaningless convo counts. I'm using my own money (I don't even have an income >_>) so if I'm not getting the full amount of playing time, I usually just don't go.

2) I RATHER NOT TALK TO YOU THAN PLAY BADMINTON. I love this sport but if it means to talk to you and all, I rather not play. At this point, I don't ever want to speak to you again. You gave church/fellowship such a bad name to me. Your style and your way of behaviour makes me sick. Yes, you're a hardworking father trying to control 5 children. However, I cannot stand your sick humour. You always complain how I never speak my mind, but that's because I don't think the environment is safe to speak on what was really on my mind.

I am eager to leave this house, to break the stupid dumb outdated 60s rules. To rid of your sick influences. I don't need your permission or your approval to make my own decision and live my life. I hate how you control freaks tries to dictates my life. I use to think that I owe my live to my parents, I use to be grateful that my parents love me enough to tolerate me and not have me thrown out the window like what happened to my neighbors. But now I realize that I owe you people nothing. Instead, you owe me A LOT MORE! I don't want to use the word hate, but I strongly dislike you people rite now. What you've done to me.

I don't know what to say. I just want to get out of this house. It's not just me, Esther and Joyce, we all want to leave.


Frige, I can't believe I tried asking permission to live my own life. SO I was like "fine, I'll walk there! Take the damn car to the many damn fellowships that we have to go!"