Somtimes...

Sometimes I feel like those rich kids, who's parents just gives them a load of cash to make up for the neglect and the lack of care. Except for the fact that we;re not rich and they never gave me a load of cash. But sometimes, they do buy me presents to make up I guess. Other times, they'll stood us out on a dinner while they're busy shopping, but told us to order anyways at some fancy restaurant and paid their with visa. I know they love us in their own way, whatever that means, but I don't know. I'm sure they have lots of things to say about me, like just yesterday, lol my father called me a disappointment. It didn't hurt, not one bit, it was a way to express his feelings at that time and I can understand where he's coming from. But then again, I can say the same for them. I don't know why, but the situation seem so sad.

You know, my lil bro, he's in Gr.4 I think? There was this parent teacher interview recently and his teacher complained that he is always tired and he's always hungry. Can you people like pack snacks for him? And of course, my mother was upset when she heard this, like "omg~ I didn't neglect my child, I'm a good parent really I am! I let him do whatever he wants as long as it doesn't bother me, I'm good" Now of course she didn't say this to the teacher's face. When my sister heard it, she got angry with my lil bro, because he should know and learn how to look after himself like how we all did. Pack his own lunch and find snacks and eat his snacks. And finally, I got angry at him because you don't tell your teacher that our parents don't feed you! You post it like a blog like what I'm doing right now (jking), but have you no dignity? You'll think the teacher will start bringing food for you if you tell them that? NO SILLY! They'll just think you have bad upbringings, then label you and tell the other teachers about it. All in all, it'll ruin your name in that school, elementary teachers are really bias.

I think the reason why I am so upset is because they don't seems to care about competition that I am currently in. I don't think they're really interested about it. Im going to NATIONAL in Montreal!! Doesn't that mean anything to you? Do you know how big a deal it is for me? They don't want to know what I'm learning and don't want us to interfere with their work. So don't BS you want to know about me!

There's a very wise saying from Jim Rohn. He said (not in exact words) you can tell your child that 'John! You've mess up!' But DON'T LEAVE THEM MESS UP!

Starving

I wonder if it ever occur to my parents that there's no food in the house. But we'll just go out and eat~ Not a problem~ It's just that I wish we have food in the house. I don't mind spending my OSAP money on breakfast and lunch outside, but it would save me a lot of money if there's food at home. It's not like I'm eating with my friends, I'm usually just dinning out alone.

So I had my exam from 2-4pm today. I got up at 9am and ate chocolate and yogart for breakfast. But those things don't last very long, so I went to timmies on my way to school for breakfast. After I finished my exam, I bus and so on and so fort, I was just starving. My bus stopped by the Loblaws and I thought I needed to buy bread and soup and so on for myself, not just for now but for the week. So I went to Loblaws, only to discover that the dollar sale was over, and things have gotten so much more expensive. I debated and decided not to buy because, silly me, would think my parents would go shopping to day (it's Sunday) and load the house with food. I also thought they might order take out for me cuz I had exams while they were all eating out for lunch (n breakfast too), but apparently, it was all wishful thinking. I came home and my parents were out still doing some church stuff Im guessing (but not shopping for sure). I asked my sister if they saved any food for me and she like laughed and said "no! Why would we do such a thing?" Like I don't know? Maybe the house got no food!? n Rebekah got exams and she had nothing to eat for the entire day??"

I have to say, I was pretty upset and somewhat angry when she said no. I should have knew it was wishful thinking and I regret not buying food on my way home. But see, I got another exam 8:30am tomorrow and instead of waiting in line, I really needs to study. Funny thing is, I'm so hungry and upset, I don't feel like studying. But after I ate more New Year chocolate I feel better. Although I was warn to not eat chocolate anymore (cuz I nearly singlehandedly lol, finish the whole box, but hey! do u honestly think I'm happy to have chocolate every single day for breakfast and lunch?), I still had a few more.

u_u I even debated if I should walk all the way back out in the cold just to get some food. What would they care?

I'm still really hungry >_> I think we're going out for dinner, but not anytime soon. >_> THese people really don't care about my exams or my education.... I would know... Whatever, it's just another one of these MANY incidents. I should have gotten use to it by now. Anyways, really needs to study.


Current Music: Need you now - Glee

GAME ON!!

So the meeting times are set. My team is coming back alive. The other cocach finally responded, this is what she said "I'll come at 8am but only because I have extremely high hopes on you guys." Now we are back on track and we are out to get them!!! FINALLY! I'll pray that we'll give it everything we got and that all our hard work will be paid off when we win first place at National. Let the intensity of the training and pressure come before me. Concordia, McMaster, Lauier and any other universities across the nation will step aside, we'll show them the meaning of superstars1

So no more bejewel~ :P If I ever feel like playing it again, I will go increase my vocab. I will also begin conditioning myself with morning excerise and also read the news everyday single day. Analysis and storytell it to my siblings~

VICTORY IS OURS!!!

Gu Zheng

I've been writing/ translating a lot of scores lately~ from Betrayal by Gary Gao or Paparazzi by Lady Gaga~ :P When I perfect them, I think I might make a videdo and post it on youtube~ it prolly won't be uploaded till summer tho. Till then, I better start better managaing my time.

*sigh* Just thinking about work is depressing.